


built you a home in my heart

by pendules



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Long-Distance Relationship, Love Confessions, M/M, Post-The Raven King, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-06-07 01:29:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6779752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pendules/pseuds/pendules
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>They don't ever say Goodbye.</i>
</p><p>A series of coming-back-togethers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	built you a home in my heart

They don't ever say _Goodbye_. It's always "I'll miss you" and "I'll miss you too" whispered into skin. It's always "Call me when you get there safe" with fingers curled gently around a wrist. It's always a soft "Thanksgiving break will be here before we know it" with a quick kiss pressed to a cheek. It's always "I'll see you soon" with a rueful smile. Maybe it's never _Goodbye_ because there's still a tiny thread of doubt deep in the recesses of Ronan's mind that maybe eventually Adam will want something _else_ , something _normal_ , something that belongs in the real world. Maybe it's because Adam still has a second or two of panic whenever Ronan goes too long without answering his phone.

Maybe they've just said enough _Goodbye_ s for a lifetime. Maybe it's a reminder, in the silence where the word should be, that they're always, _always_ going to come back to each other.

*

The first time Adam comes back, he drops his bag on the porch and kisses Ronan up against the doorframe, with an audience watching their every move.

He pulls away just to say, "Get inside, idiot. I'm not blowing you in front of the deer."

*

He wakes up to Adam's body sprawled all over his own for the first time in months and smiles for a long, content moment.

"Do we _have_ to get out of bed today?" Adam murmurs against his neck, eventually, eyes still closed.

Ronan wishes they didn't have to, _ever_.

"Don't be a lazy-ass, Parrish. Gansey and Sargent are gonna be here in a few hours and we have things to do before then."

"I'm not milking any cows, though," he says seriously. "I don't think they like me very much."

Ronan laughs.

*

"Is that a dream turkey?" Adam asks, frowning at the thawing bird.

Ronan just stares at him impassively. "What do you _think_?"

"Does it _taste_ like real turkey?" It's more doubtful than curious.

"Ye of little faith. I _have_ practised this before, you know."

Adam actually looks impressed for a moment.

"Who knew you'd turn into a devoted housewife, Lynch?" he teases.

"You _love_ it," Ronan says, smirking, before pressing him back against the counter and kissing away any further protestations.

"Don't tell Blue I said that, though," Adam says when they separate. 

"I'll just tell her it's part of our role-play and we will not be kink-shamed in our own house."

Adam laughs. " _God_ , do you want to give Gansey a heart attack at Thanksgiving dinner?"

"We can wear costumes too if you want," he says casually.

Adam seems to remember something, then. "Hang on. Speaking of — I have something for you." 

He disappears into the living room and returns with a white apron.

He turns it around so Ronan can see the writing on the front, in bold, bright pink letters: _DREAM BOY._

"Asshole," he says fondly.

"You love it," Adam says, grinning.

*

"I'm always gonna hate watching you leave, aren't I?" he says a few days later. He's leaning against one of the porch pillars as Adam leans against him, Ronan's arm around his shoulders.

"The coming back part is good, though, right?" Adam says softly, looking up at him.

"Yeah. _Yeah_."

*

Ronan leaves Opal with Declan and Matthew for a couple days and goes up to visit Adam over spring break.

Adam takes him on a tour of the university and introduces him to his suite mates and his classmates and his coworkers at the hip coffee shop near to campus. He isn't self-conscious or guarded around his new friends, he talks more than he usually does, he laughs surprisingly easily. Everyone seems to love him. Ronan holds his hand tightly, not out of possessiveness but out of pride and gratitude.

They spend a day walking around the city, eating ice-cream and wandering aimlessly through museums and kissing on park benches. It's all painfully normal and wonderful and everything Adam deserves. Adam's brighter here, in this big, bustling city, spine straight and shoulders thrown back; he's not trying to make himself small or to go unseen. He's so far removed from the boy who used to walk the halls of Aglionby with his shoulders hunched and head down (though he was still the only person Ronan ever noticed).

He's who he was always meant to be. 

"You're happy here, aren't you?" Ronan asks the night before he leaves. He's sitting on Adam's bed, playing with the blue and purple dream butterfly that Adam keeps with him, letting it run over his fingers.

"Yeah," Adam says, turning around in his desk chair to nod at him. "I am."

"I'm glad," he says, sincerely.

"I'm happy with _you_ too, you know," he adds, quietly.

"I know." And then, more cautiously, looking down at his hands instead of at him, "You're gonna stay, aren't you? In the city. After you graduate."

"I don't know." He takes a breath before continuing. "It doesn't just have to be _one_ place, you know."

"What?" he asks, flicking his gaze back up to Adam's face.

" _Home_."

He frowns slightly at that, considering. He'd give Adam a million homes if he could, but he's always known he had to make one for himself. He never expected he'd want to _share_ it like this, though, but maybe it was always an unspoken agreement, just like how Adam knows he'll always have a home at the Barns now. Maybe anywhere either of them call home will always be _theirs_. Maybe that's what this _is_.

" _You're_ my home," Ronan says without hesitation.

"You are too," he says, reaching out and touching his fingers to Ronan's, the butterfly crawling seamlessly from his hand onto Adam's.

*

They don't ever say _I love you_. At least not out loud. At least not for a while.

They don't need to. They already know. They say it a million different times in a million different ways.

*

It's Adam's twenty-first and Ronan's drunk and Adam's pretty tipsy (which, delightfully, seems to involve a lot of giggling and whispering dirty suggestions in Ronan's ear) and they're swaying completely out of rhythm to some techno song with Adam's arms around his waist — and then the song changes and Ronan rolls his eyes at Henry (who only lifts his glass at him in acknowledgment) and Adam just laughs against his neck.

So, that's how they end up making out to Madonna, Adam's tongue in his mouth, bittersweet and hot and intoxicating, his head swimming in all of it. He's too drunk for it to be anything but messy, wet and breathy and uncoordinated. He's too drunk for what comes next, probably.

Adam pulls back and looks at him, mouth kiss-swollen and obscene, eyes huge and bright. There are beads of sweat running down his neck and his hair's a fucking wreck. He looks _gorgeous_. Free and alive and invincible. _Happy._ Everything Ronan's ever wanted.

He blinks at him for a moment and then he says his name, like he's seeing him for the first time. 

"Yeah?"

He says it again.

"Are you hallucinating? Did you take something?"

Adam rolls his eyes. 

" _What?_ " he finally demands.

"I love you," he says, and it seems to drown out the pounding bass. Seems to drown out the world.

Adam smiles at him and it's the brightest thing he's ever seen.

He just stares, mouth parting slightly, suddenly feeling more sober than he ever has in his life. He swallows.

He knows that Adam knows how he feels, has always known. He knows that he's saying it because he _wants_ to, not because he wants anything in return, because he's grateful that he _can_ say it.

He knows he's actually really fucking drunk and this is probably the worst time Adam could've chosen, but it feels _perfect_ somehow.

He knows he's about to say something epically stupid so he has the sense to pull Adam back into him and kiss him, hard and fierce, instead.

They don't stop until they're literally gasping for breath.

"Wanna get out of here?" he says eventually, with a raised eyebrow.

Adam grabs his hand, smiles at him again, softer but content. "Always."

*

Two years later, Ronan watches him cross the stage and accept his degree. Gansey and Blue are both cheering wildly next to him, but he just _looks_ at him, looks at the shifting expressions on his face. He looks almost nervous as he approaches and then he's holding on to the scroll like it's a lifeline and then a true smile blooms as he descends.

Gansey and Blue leave them alone for a minute after showering him with hugs and congratulations.

Adam finally looks at him properly and the smile's gone now. His eyes are wide and disbelieving and his lips are trembling slightly.

Ronan pulls him close, holds him tight, hands fisted in the smooth, silky fabric of his graduation gown. Adam buries his face into his neck, taking shaky breaths. Ronan whispers, "I'm proud of you." And then, "I love you."

He feels the tears, of relief, of _joy_ , running down Adam's face against his own skin.


End file.
